So. Maybe DWTS is a little out of touch for me....

A Dollar’s Worth

By Alisa Dollar

Anyone had a dingbat moment? I just had a whole weekend. Not known for my gracefulness, I exceeded my own expectations.

Everything started well. I bounced out of bed Saturday morning—okay I drug myself out of bed with a mission of cleaning out closets and getting rid of clothes (for real this time) to take to Salvation Army.

I left a huge wood box of books because I didn’t think Salvation Army would take books of a spicy nature.

I made dinner of scrambled eggs, sausage crumbles (did you know you can buy those already cooked and crumbled?) and hash browns. I balanced the plate of goodies, a diet coke and napkin and headed for the computer room. Max was bouncing along beside me.

I usually go straight to my chair so I didn’t turn the light on and therefore I’d forgotten the huge box of spicy books----until I tripped and dived over them head first into my chair, which thankfully, was facing the disaster in the making.

My dinner was in the chair; Max was dancing and yipping around my feet. I must add here I’d recently visited Doc Jolly with a toe so infected he wouldn’t touch it and was on mega antibiotics.

Max was uncaring of my poor bloody toe while I was screaming bloody loud. He was uncaring I put a huge knot on my other leg. He had food on the brain.

I must have really good bones because I never break anything except my pride.

Max feasted while I hobbled to turn on the light and move the spicy box. I wanted to kick it it to the corner but didn’t dare.

If that wasn’t enough Sunday before church I put a roast, potatoes and carrots into the slow cooker for dinner. Around 4 I checked and it wasn’t where I thought it should be. I touched the cooker; it was cold. I told husband I needed a new cooker.

Rather than give me the benefit of doubt he asked if it was plugged in. I would love to tell you I need a new cooker; instead all I’m saying is we are having roast for tommorrow night's dinner.

Daughter’s friend suggested I get a light clapper.

I’m wondering if there is a multi-task clapper for lights and keys and cookers. Maybe even flash drives!

Husband said they would be clapping all time.

I get no respect.

 

Shopping this time of year? Of course !

A Dollar’s Worth

By Alisa Dollar        

Daughter was here for a week sans kids and husband. It was very nice to have her to ourselves for a couple of days.

I’ve gotten spoiled to shopping online. It’s easier because I don’t have to fight traffic, grabby hands, and crabby people.

This time of year only intensifies those feelings.

Daughter likes to physically shop, touch everything and dig for bargains. I think we hit every store. I also think she learned from the best. Me. She is in the height of her bargain ability and it passed me two fake knees ago.  

By the third day I was wondering if her guilty pleasure Star Bucks was putting triple or quadruple espresso in her coffee. She was like an energizer bunny.

When she started to pack it became apparent we were going to need another huge duffel bag. All I can say is if they checked her luggage completely they would find no one corner or space in those two huge duffel bags.

She likes to buy Christmas presents here because there is no winter in Phoenix so the late summer and fall clothing doesn’t mark down as they do here.

One of our stops was a huge cosmetic store. I have never seen so many things for anti-aging. I was nearly sure there was a Botox shoot up in the back. Most of the sales ladies looked like mannequins they were so fake. The sad thing they were young and not even trying to regain their youthful good looks. They just took away from their natural beauty.

I browsed around in all the anti-anti stuff when daughter came over with several bottles of nail color

“Did you know for $75 dollars a fourth oz. me and my skin will look twenty again?” I glanced over to check her reaction and because of it added, “Yeah, I thought truth in advertising too.”

I noticed the nail polish colors she carried and two were gray. It was a new concept for me; I’d seen almost every other color on her, some of which should be banned as colors for nails.

I do buy lots of polish, but I only paint my toenails.

With nail polish in sack we left the store to conquer another store.

We had to take the polish to the car first. Jingling bottles aren’t safe the way she shops.

By the end of the day, I’m pooped, but in a good way.

Oh, I did buy the gray nail polish too.

I figure what’s good for her nails are good for my toenails!

Hearing - or not......

A Dollar’s Worth

By Alisa Dollar

I’ve talked many times about getting older.

I’ve spoken about arthritis often because that’s my thorn in flesh so to speak. I have never touched on hearing because that isn’t one of my problems.

Though I always thought husband had selective hearing, I realized too late in the game he really couldn’t hear.

He finally gave into the ego and price and along with his insurance paid a nice sum for a pair of ears.

They work so well I have to be very careful what I really don’t want him to hear.

It’s been an adjustment for him as well.

I didn’t understand he could hear, but everything was extremely distorted. I don’t know how many times I repeated the same thing over and over and over until I thought I’d scream.

Okay, I’ll admit. I did scream.

I just didn’t realize how helpless he felt.

Until the ears came into the family and it was then I realized how much he’d missed. Not just TV, but interactions with people.

I can’t even imagine what it would be like to not hear someone directly in front of you. I wondered why he often let his gaze drift, thinking how rude that must seem to the person speaking to him.

Husband is a researcher of everything, especially if it concerns money. If I have the money and I want it, I buy it. One of the many reasons I drive him crazy.

Not him. Apparently unbeknownst to me, he’d been secretly researching hearing aids. Not to get into a hearing aid dispute, he chose to go with a company that had a representative in town and not the local one who sent weekly pamphlets in the mail.

For him, it was a good choice because he felt he had the upper hand in the transaction. It’s also not much fun to sell to a person who knows more about the product than some of the salespersons.

Luckily for husband they clicked. The representative enjoyed the fact that husband knew intricate details to discuss.

Many dollars later, it’s still the right decision.

This is not to say it’s been easy. Hearing aids are an adjustment like anything else and I’ve watched him go through many.

However, tenacity and will have won and overall he’s a happy camper with his purchase.

So am I.

I don’t scream near as much.

I do whisper though. J