Thursday, July 12, 2012

Dancing With the Stars Wannabe. That's me.....

A Dollar’s Worth
By Alisa Dollar


I have always accused husband of selective hearing. I think I have it also.

A co-worker and I went to a business expo where vendors give pens and note pads to advertise their product.

I tend to get lost so co-worker became my “person.”

Person was talking to a nice looking, well dressed young man. I thought he was one of our students. As it turned out he was Person’s daughter’s boyfriend.

I really know how to make an impression. At least an impression which left him thankful Person was his girlfriend’s mom and not me.

He represented a dance studio in town. I told him husband and I dance, but husband was interested in only Western Swing and I didn’t know if I could get him to take ballroom dancing.

Dancer said that his studio taught many different types which included Western Swing, country and ballroom. He went on to say the ballroom dances were foxtrot, waltz, tango, Latin, quickstep and samba.

“Excuse me?”

“Yes?” He answered expectantly.

“Did you say lap dance?”

The very minute it came out of my mouth and I saw the look on Dancer’s and Person’s face I knew I’d not only misunderstood but probably insulted the Ballroom Society of the World, should there be such an organization.

“No ma’am.”

With that “ma’am” I immediately recognized I’d misspoken – just like politicians today, I had my foot in my mouth and I was feasting heartily on it while wondering where in the world I’d gotten lap dance.

“I said Latin dances.” Dancer replied and by this time he and Person were laughing and I was beet red with embarrassment. Hard to believe I was embarrassed, but I was mortified.

I’m not supposed to know what a lap dance is, right? I hadn’t even seen Magic Mike.

Yet.

After we laughed and Person explained to Dancer I was relatively harmless he decided to teach me the foxtrot.

Right there.

In the middle of the floor.

With people watching.

It was really fun, after I sort of got the hang of it.

As a Dancing With the Stars addict, for one fleeting moment I had myself on the show, dancing with Maks (only he had a shirt on), doing the foxtrot thinking I’d win the mirror ball trophy.

Dancer was very nice and told me I did a good job. Person was still laughing, so I’m not sure.

I really don’t have a place for that mirror ball trophy anyway.